I don't really vent much but I need, I mean really need some help! This past year was not the best. I had a trio of students that made the year difficult, and add to that our principal left mid year... and then my knee issue and it was probably the worst year of my teaching career. I really don't want to put to much out on my blog but I need help. I can't seem to let go of it. Every wonderful new idea that I am learning in Summer Institute is slammed back by memories of the triple D (the 3 students who were difficult). Or by thoughts of well I won't have any support for this idea. I'm really struggling.... more than I ever have. I need to shake off last year and start getting excited about next year. I'm stuck....how do I shake off the old... not let it bother me... how do I move forward with the baggage from the year before! Please share... I need it!
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I hear you. Last year was incredibly difficult for me too... I had a difficult group of kids too. I just keep telling myself: I love my job; I love teaching; next year HAS to be better.... I mean what are the odds, right? :-P
ReplyDeleteHang in there!
I think you have to look at what you learned from your problem kiddos- how did you grow as a teacher from having that experience. Then I think you have to think about the kiddos that were wonderful, adorable and lovable and focus on the positives. I had two extreme problems in my room this year that made it difficult, but you just have to keep focusing on the good. We had a professional development presentation last year that has us constantly asking each other at the end of the day "What went well?" Focusing on that really made the problems, although still there, seem to diminish a little because we made the conscious effort to look at the good. I wish you the best this coming year!
ReplyDeleteKarla
my heart is hurting for you, as I know things can be tough at times - last year was also a doosey for me (not behavior issues, but other things)... in addition, I always have prek teachers who 'warn' me about the 'troubled' children I will soon have (as I volunteer to have he special needs students in my kinder class). I do NOT want to know ahead of time, so I am able to give each child an 'equal' chance when they step into my room. SO... how do you put all of this aside to begin and be excited about a new year? This is what I do - pray, pretend, and think positively. First, I pray about the coming year and ask for wisdom, guidance and the ability to be someone who can touch lives in a positive way (& hopefully teach them all they need...lol). Then, I pretend (clear my mind) that all the things in the past are gone - not that I didn't learn from the experience, but like turning to a new FRESH page. To get excited, I think on a positive note that this will be a great year! One VERY important thing I have had to remind myself over the years (and I pinned something about this the other day) - think positive & positive things will happy; keep your chin up buttercup, and I am sure there will be good things to come:):) sending lots of *hugs* your way...
ReplyDelete~ Kimberlee ~
Two Fulbright Hugs
First things first, STOP! I know where you are coming from and I also know where this can take you, I have so been there and I don't want you to follow that path. I almost transferred from a school that I consider heaven on Earth, because of a very, very, very bad year. I am talking Baker Acting, kicking, screaming, desk throwing year. I had to evacuate my students, so one could just do the damage they felt they had to do at the time. I cried, I yelled, I shook and I was weakened in front of my team at my grade level meetings. I lost it. That was this school year, so it is fresh in my mind. Here is how I fixed myself.
ReplyDeleteIt is not your fault, it is not your fault, it is not your fault. You are a special teacher, a special person, and someone who, against all odds, continues to come back each year to nourish little minds, in spite of it all. This is who you are, you are an angel among us. Let it go, give it to God, and stay positive. You can do this and when you feel that you can't, just holler. We are a special breed, us blogging teachers. I have never had the support (even from people I have known forever) that I have from the bloggers I have come to know through posts and comments.
Keep Calm and Pray....
Faithful in First
Oohh I totally know how you feel I had 4 difficult students last year and no support from administration. It was the worst year I have ever had. Honestly I am still a bit scared about the upcoming year but I just keep telling my self that this much will be much better. I just kind of let last year go and have decided to get ready for this NEW year..a better year.
DeleteGosh it sucks to have last year stuck swirling around in your head. Our K team has a ritual at the end of each year - the last day of school we sort out all our cum folders to go up to first grade...that's not out of the ordinary, but we use it as a therapy session:) When we get to a student's folder that was a trial (to say it nicely) we just let it all out - we vent, we spill it all. And then we put the cum down in next year's pile and wash our hands of it. It sounds so silly, but it works wonders! We have a big team (9 K teachers) but we all love and respect each other and what is said in that room while we vent stays there and is never spoken of again. Maybe you just need to have a vent session - if you don't have a vent partner just say it out loud to yourself. Yell it, scream it if you need to. Not just about the students, but the situations, the trials, the stress, all of it - just let it out verbally.
ReplyDeleteAnd all that being said - look forward to next year with your mind open. You never know if someone's going to back you or not until you try. And remember "YOU ARE THE QUEEN OF YOUR ROOM!" Our K team lives by this mantra and we repeat it to each other often. If you don't get the support you need, maybe you can't do all you wanted, but you can do some of it..try a little out here and there and then show the results you got and try of support again next year.
Remember - You are the queen of your room. You will make it through this tough time and you will be a better teacher for it. You will.
I totally know how you feel. I had an extremely difficult year as well. I was co-teaching but ended up doing all the work, severe behavior problems (had to keep the walkie with me at all times), and now complete change in our administration. By the end of the year I was mad at the world but I will say that as time has gone by this summer, I've gotten over it. Still apprehensive about next year and any changes that may take place but having faith that it will work out. Let last year go and look forward to next year but be sure to take time for you first.
ReplyDeleteCindy
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ReplyDeleteRose
"The Wonderful World of Kindergarten"